I’ll be honest the running is neither enjoyable nor going well at the minute. I’ve been so tired not just my eyes, my bones, even my finger nails hurt. Yet I still manage to do my Lindsay Brin abs workout and the 30 day shred to shift the lbs each day. Why? Because I’m following a plan and seeing an improvement each day (nothing to do with it being in doors nice and warm….)
My problem is mental. I’m depressed putting my running gear on as it’s still snug. I’m depressed when I start running as I feel so unfit and get more depressed looking at how slow and inefficient I’m running so I just want to stop and sulk.
I loved running so much, gutted it’s become such a chore.
I’m not ready to rejoin my running club the Pudsey Pacers, my ego won’t let me start in the lower group at the back. Stupid eh? To be fair you should be able to run a few miles without potentially pissing yourself before running in company – that’s a given.
I’ve just been out now as had a good night’s sleep last night. It was the first run in two weeks I think and it was piss poor. I was obsessing over how slow I was running, how out of breath I was etc. etc.
So I’m writing this so it’s official. I’m a beginner runner. There I said it. I’m not someone that’s run a sub 4 hour marathon, I’m a beginner.
Now I’ve got to man up, swallow the pride and do what a beginner does. Run for time not speed or distance. So I’m going to follow this schedule and see how it goes.
On the upside I’ve only got 5lb to lose of the nearly 3 stone I gained and my abs are slowly getting back together – the stomach is now flat. So some personal achievements over the last 11 weeks (aside from my daughter getting bigger and funnier each day). Let’s see what I can do over the next 11.